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popslash_lollipops2009-03-03 06:48 pm
turps33.livejournal.com) wrote in popslash_lollipops2009-03-03 06:48 pm
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Request Brian/Eminem
I'd like to request Brian/Eminem.
Think about it. Eminem teaching Brian how to rap, in return Brian teaching him how to chair dance. They could bicker as they make a joint album, fighting over what constitutes swearing and the ratio of cheesy to offensive lyrics. A fight that, of course, ends in sex.
Thank you to anyone that considers it :)
Think about it. Eminem teaching Brian how to rap, in return Brian teaching him how to chair dance. They could bicker as they make a joint album, fighting over what constitutes swearing and the ratio of cheesy to offensive lyrics. A fight that, of course, ends in sex.
Thank you to anyone that considers it :)
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"Morning, y'all! Sorry I'm late." Brian dropped a bag on the desk, on top of the CD. "I brought coffee and everyone's favourite donuts to make up for it. And Nick, I picked up some fresh fruit for you, so don't start about carbs, and AJ, I even got the special latte with the—" He looked between them. "Wow. Serious faces. What's up, guys?"
"What's up?" Howie snatched the booklet from Nick and waved it in Brian's face. "What's up?"
"Oh, that's where I left it!" He shifted the coffees and donuts to the side. "Yeah, of course, I emptied my bag out on the desk last night right before I went home, looking for gum. Man, I should've thought of that, instead of turning the house upside down. So, y'all listen to any of it? What did y'all think?"
Howie made a sound oddly suggestive of a bat in pain.
Brian's face fell. "You didn't like it?"
"I think it's fly!" AJ said. "And to be honest, I'm kinda looking forwards to spending more time with the dogs, once you've flushed our careers down the toilet."
"But it's for charity!" Brian looked between them. "I'm gonna use one of the tracks for my solo slot in the next tour, I think. Marshall thought that would be good—like, maybe heal some of the rifts between pop and hip hop. And he's gonna do the same. I said I'd teach him how to do the chair dance."
Howie moaned.
"Brian, man," Nick said. "You can't. I mean, I know we support each other in our solo projects and shit, and it's for a good cause, really, I get that, and I'm not saying the music's bad, either, just—dude. Dude."
"Oh. Right, I see." Brian frowned, mouth turned down.
Howie shifted uncomfortably. "Brian. I'm sorry, we just...it's kind of not what we were expecting. And we all feel—"
"Oh, no," AJ said. "You don't get to hand this off to the rest of us. You're the one with his panties in a bunch."
Brian sighed. "No, it's okay. I guess I was hoping for more support, that's all. I guess—" Suddenly, his mournful expression cracked into a grin, and he slapped the table, hard. "Ha!" He drew his breath in with a whoop of laughter. "Oh, boy. Oh, that's—y'all thought I was serious, didn't you? For real? Hah! Marshall owes me a sundae."
"What?" Howie said.
"Guys." Brian looked around the room. "Did no one check the calendar this morning?"
The wall calender in the studio showed the wrong month. The page hadn't been turned over, yet, because yesterday had been the last day of March.
"Oh, you fucker," Nick said, and laughed. "No, you motherfucker. Man, that was epic!"
AJ coughed. "Wow, I didn't notice the date at all."
"Oh, Jesus." Howie sat down on the arm of the couch. "Jesus. Brian, you have no idea how—I swear, I aged ten years when I heard that first track."
"Well, maybe that'll teach you to treat creativity with respect and open-mindedness, Howard—all the other tracks are just loops of me and Marshall laughing our asses off in the studio." Brian pulled out his cell and flipped it open. "Look, I'll make it up to you. You wanna listen over the phone while Marshall pitches to his guys? He's got the other version, the one where we duet Amazing Grace, and between verses he repents all his previous lyrics and promises he's never gonna swear again."
***
***
p.s. Mette! WHERE IS YOUR STORY!?
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I love you!
And really hope this is a start of the Brian/Eminem movement.
THANK YOU!
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And two is a movement, right? Because I'm still waiting for Mette's Brian/Eminem. She promised us!
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"Should we call Kevin in?" Nick suggested. "'Cause, you know, cousins. And maybe a touch of scary wouldn't be bad right now."
Also, I am DUMB, for I didn't for a minute suspect it could be an april fools joke.
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Glad you liked it!
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(Okay, I did guess it was an April's Fool fic, but that didn't make it any less fun.)
Come to Jesus, bitches.
I love it.
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Although, looking at it again, it could really use more teddy bears.
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